Banker of Last Retort

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Banker of Last Retort

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Podcasts

View > Compliance conundrum: Friday, 6 June 2008 When the banker helps his head of compliance get out of having to do two days of charity work, he is forced to question whether it is a smart career move. MR BANKER

View > Watching the detectives: Friday, 30 May 2008 Bigwigs at ASIC and the ASX have done some soul searching and given themselves a clean bill of health, despite a mountain of evidence to the contrary. MR BANKER

View > An impostor: Friday, 16 May 2008 It is unlikely that a senior executive could manage to be so consistently de-motivating and utterly uninspiring by accident. MR BANKER

View > An Opes anomoly: Saturday, 10 May 2008 The other three banks may be at least temporarily happy that the regulators are being kept busy... but that may change. MR BANKER

View > Unethical or stupid?: Friday, 2 May 2008 Banks involved in stock lending might not be doing anything illegal, but they are certainly carrying on in dumb way. MR BANKER

View > Stupidity fights back: Friday, 18 April 2008 A kind interpretation of our credit market conundrums may put 'incompetent' in place of 'fraudulent', given that financial institutions seem rife with the former. MR BANKER

View > Not if, but when….: Friday, 11 April 2008 Talk of credit rationing may have spooked a few at the far end of the barnyard, but the reality is that the fodder is already being thinly spread. MR BANKER

View > Gen Y loan agreement: Friday, 4 April 2008 I have discovered what is probably an Australian first, if not a world first: a court case involving a dispute about a loan agreement that was ‘documented’ via SMS - in true Gen Y style.

View > Grey-haired rats are deserting: Friday, 28 March 2008 I should never have strayed into Nostradamus territory – I didn't realise how hard it is to back-pedal while skidding downhill. MR BANKER

View > Where next for banks?: Friday, 14 March 2008 Mortgage rate increases from banks may be on the nose PR-wise, so watch out for business loan, credit card or personal loan rate hikes. MR BANKER

View > Assorted grumbles and complaints: Friday, 7 March 2008 Polls, apologies, interest rates and inflation – I thought we had enough to lose sleep over without worrying about bank stocks.

View > How, but why?: Friday, 29 February 2008 How could a AAA product turn into a junk bond risk, especially when held by a Big Four bank? I can only speculate...

View > Linkages, linkages: Friday, 22 February 2008 In my view the credit squeeze is not fully played out. If the “monoline” insurers fail – as some predict – things will be much, much worse.

View > Hold on a minute...: Friday, 15 February 2008 A bout of bank bashing from Canberra has, perhaps inadvertently, thrown the relativity of who raises rates, and when, into sharp contrast.

View > What on earth is happening?: Friday, 1 February 2008 What is going on with the sharemarket!? There seems to be several camps with ready answers – but I may not have enough grains of salt for each of them.

View > Predictions: Friday, 25 January 2008 The Rudd Government may soon need to reveal that the last government left the country in a pretty bad way. Now, which promise was 'non-core'?...

View > Risky money: Friday, 18 January 2008 There are many lessons for entrepreneurs from the Centro debacle, not least of which is related to just what motivates your financial institution.

View > Merry Christmas: Friday, 14 December 2007 Our banks are suffering, poor things, from balance sheet pressure. But the resulting careful 'rationing' of credit looks like having a profitable side-effect. Phew!

View > But it may not happen, Cassandra: Friday, 7 December 2007 Economists have a habit of being ‘right’ about the future until events ‘prove’ the justifications they have to come up with for having got it so wrong.

View > Elections: Friday, 30 November 2007 I guess there are at least a few lessons to be learned from the election results. Here are a few that I've come to realise...

View > Not as they seem: Friday, 23 November 2007 The birth of a balance sheet at the end of the financial year is indeed an act of creation.

View > Tactical decision: Friday, 16 November 2007 There is new paradigm critical to survival in corporate life. Are you tactical or strategic?

View > The c-word: Friday, 19 October 2007 A US 'think tank' has come up with a solution to a crisis spurred on by an off-balance-sheet borrowing vehicle. Their answer? A bigger, super-vehicle of the same ilk. You've got to wonder...

View > Don’t let the business be bad for business: Friday, 12 October 2007 Is working yourself into a near-death state a sound business strategy? I wouldn't bank on it.

View > Westpac’s sidestep: Friday, 5 October 2007 Westpac’s purchase of RAMS story has a tantalising sidebar: what’s happening to the $14 billion loan book that Westpac did not buy.

View > Black arts: Friday, 28 September 2007 One could never call the figures in a financial statement rubbery – but there is magic in the morass of text that accompanies them, with not always benevolent intent.

View > On again off again: Friday, 21 September 2007 When the banks move debt "off balance sheet", is this some form of financial jiggery-pokery? Well no, sort of...

View > His lips were (almost) sealed: Friday, 14 September 2007 Opening a new account was as much of an adventure as closing the old one. This time I was given a glimpse of Secret Bankers’ Business.

View > Desktop support: Friday, 7 September 2007 Do I exist? Without the requisite documentation, IT support has its doubts...

View > Where to from here?: Friday, 24 August 2007 Right now there are investment managers working out what exposure they have, whether they need to sell, and whether they need to disclose the position.

View > Service? In what sense?: Friday, 17 August 2007 I thought closing a credit card account would be simple enough, but I hadn’t reckoned on the new era of customer service. And the bank hasn’t reckoned on me…

View > The banker’s view of the market jitters: Monday, 13 August 2007 Where to from here? But first let me explain what is really happening.

View > Why are they jumping ship?: Friday, 10 August 2007 When experienced bankers suddenly start looking for jobs elsewhere you have to wonder what might be coming…

View > Distraction with a D: Friday, 3 August 2007 There was no mistaking her intent when she aimed the full glare of her cleavage at me: it was to distract me from a mistake. The mistake was all hers.

View > Payment in kind?: Friday, 27 July 2007 In matters of security over borrowings, there's nothing like a little syntax to smooth a banker's furrowed brow.

View > Goal congruence: Friday, 20 July 2007 Take a good measure of questionable morale, add a dash of bonus, stir vigorously 360 degrees. The result? Goal congruence.

View > Bonus time: read and learn: Friday, 13 July 2007 Nine careful steps, a plausible manner and a dash of chicanery will ensure a festive conclusion to bonus season.

View > Transparently unfair: Friday, 6 July 2007 It would be a mistake to believe that only women are disadvantaged by the glass ceiling that keeps them below banking’s snow line.

View > Curiouser and curiouser: Friday, 29 June 2007 The minor blamestorm sweeping the bank over bad debts is unlikely to claim any casualties, but it might leave some noses out of joint.

View > Government subsidies please!: Friday, 22 June 2007 Reading the ‘sporting news’ on a quiet afternoon, the report of a melee involving some of the game’s biggest names gave me an idea.

View > Performance management: Friday, 15 June 2007 Performance appraisals are a thankless and fruitless burden, guaranteed to disappoint all but the paperweights in HR.

View > Generation gap: Friday, 8 June 2007 I though the the baby boomers ahead of me were pushy and self-absorbed. Then I started interviewing Gen-Ys.

View > Ah, that sounds much better: Friday, 1 June 2007 Bankers who eschew lending for consolidation might be tempted to back a roll-up. The difference? Well, they sound different.

View > Special projects, special strategies: Friday, 25 May 2007 Formulating the budget for a project is an art in itself, and here the usual rules definitely do not apply.

View > What’s in a job title?: Friday, 18 May 2007 I’ve just opened an electronic memo from my personal assistant, in which she proposes being re-titled as an “executive assistant”. What's she plotting?

View > Private equity: Friday, 11 May 2007 Too prudent and conservative to invest in private equity funds? Don't worry, your super fund has probably done it for you.

View > Never mind the costs, feel the add-back!: Friday, 4 May 2007 Don’t measure up? It may be simply a matter of changing the yardstick.

View > Managing your banker: Friday, 27 April 2007 With a credit squeeze coming, managing your banking relationship might need some fancy footwork to present an alternative reality!

View > Banking and intelligent design: Friday, 20 April 2007 The latest staff roadshow had me drifting off again, this time to thoughts of intelligent design and our omnipotent deity, the chief executive.

View > Ah, technology: Friday, 30 March 2007 Another test, another perfect score and as easy as sipping coffee. It’s all a matter of having a banker’s firm grip on technology.

View > Battle stations, it's audit time: Friday, 23 March 2007 When the internal auditors arrive for a snoop, it’s time to take evasive action and distract them with the trusty Auditor Management Plan.

View > They must believe: Friday, 16 March 2007 How to get that bonus you so richly deserve. It starts with conditioning…

View > Conference call: problem solved: Friday, 9 March 2007 When disaster threatened, it was Six Sigma to the rescue. Thanks, Six Sigma.

View > Team building: Friday, 2 March 2007 Corporate team building: what's it really for?

View > Risk? What a yawn!: Friday, 23 February 2007 Like any comedy, meetings are all about timing. So when to gather banking’s finest to discuss risk?

View > Know what I’m saying?: Friday, 16 February 2007 Ah! jargon. We've all been guilty of using it. And sometimes business can't seem to be conducted without it.

View > By the numbers: Friday, 9 February 2007 As if there is ever any doubt about how the budget process will pan out! A little preparation ensures business as usual.

View > Breakneck banking: Friday, 2 February 2007 The ability to nod thoughtfully has played an important part in my steady rise through middle management.

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