My PA is flirting with me. Help!
Wednesday, 23 July 2008
My new PA is a sycophantic flirt. I have no interest in her whatsoever, as I find her boring and tedious. But she always goes out of her way to compliment me, accidentally touch me or make up excuses to talk to me alone.
And I can’t tell you how she dresses because I keep my eyes fixed on the floor when she leans over my desk. How do I tell her that I am not interested without hurting her feelings? She is only 25 and it’s her first job out of uni, but I really have to do something Aunty B, because it’s driving me nuts.
Rowan S,
Perth
Dear Rowan,
Hang on. I am confused. You say she is a sycophantic flirt and then you assume she’s interested in you. So let’s look at the two scenarios.
Let’s say she is a sycophantic flirt. You are assuming that she is flirting to what end? Get more money? Move up the ladder?
Get her manager to address this in her performance review. Point out that she needs to dress more appropriately as she is on the front line. And that she needs to mature in the workplace by treating colleagues and bosses with more respect. That means not being so familiar with people.
If on the other hand, you feel she genuinely likes you, then it is a different matter. Make sure you are not alone with her. Can you move her to a different role where you have less to do with her? If she “accidentally” touches you, move swiftly away and frown. On no account should you tell her you are not interested. That’s not your role. You could also request a mature member of staff take her under their wing.
Rowan, she’s young. I am sure that if the people around you are all respectful and mature in the
workplace, she will quickly pick up the culture and behave accordingly.
Good luck,
Your Aunty B
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